Where are all the hot girls?

Posted in Stuff on March 17, 2010 by Mike

I’m thinking about making a come back. Nothing too crazy. Just slowly jumping back into the blogging.

Let me tell you – I have some wicked stories to tell you from my year off. I mean … think dodgy massage parlors, affairs with married women and sex on a bus. I know – a bus!

But I don’t want to get ahead of myself. I’d love to make a come back but only if you guys want to read my stuff – let me know in the comments whether I should start blogging again and if I get a few nice comments than it’s on!

Thanks for reading.

Sex at work … ?

Posted in awkwardness, Dodgy, Girls, raunchy, sex, sex in public, sex with strangers, strangers, ugly girls, unavailable women, women, work, workmates on May 13, 2008 by Mike

Another dull work day. Luckily my job isn’t always dull, but there are dull moments and today is a prolonged one of those. Dull, dull, dull.

And when things are dull my mind wanders. Today it’s wandering back to the time I had sex, at work, with one of the female cleaners …

… did I mention she was about 50? (I was only 24 at the time!)

It’s a late night and I’m working to get my hours back on track. My flexi-time is desperately negative and I need to make up the hours or I won’t get paid my normal salary. Working life is harsh! By 7.30pm – it’s just me, sitting around soaking up work hours.

It’s dark outside and the automatic lights at the end of the room are switching off because there is no one around to trick their sensors. I’m alone.

At 8.15pm the automatic lights come on again as the cleaner comes through the door. She’s old, blonde and slightly overweight. Her mind isn’t what it used to be judging by her self involved musings and chatter. Half the time I can’t understand what’s she’s saying. But I’m horny so I take an interest.

I get up to leave, with my bag, and say hello. My mind is thinking about having a wank in the toilet on the way out but I stop to talk to the cleaner. She’s keen to talk about her daughter and some random guy she met at a bar. So we chat for a few minutes. And the conversation turns.

I can’t remember how it came about but I manage to mention my worry about the size of my ‘package’. I tell her all guys worry about it and I’m never quite sure whether I’m big, medium or small. She say’s that it looks fine from where she is standing. (My package grows as I realise what could be on it’s way) I tell her ‘you can’t tell with jeans on, jeans make it look bigger then it is’. She says gives it a slight graze and says it seems fine. I say ‘Hold on, let’s go up the end and you can tell me’.

God knows how this worked – but like I said, her mind wasn’t exactly all there.

So we head to the back of the large room, behind a cupboard. I unzip. She puts her hand down my pants and starts moving my foreskin up and down, saying ‘Mmm, that’s nice’. I enjoy it for a moment before putting one hand down her top and the other into her underwear, playing with her breasts and arse. She keeps saying how nice it feels and I slip my fingers across to play with her clit.

She moans.

We’re standing near a meeting table so it doesn’t take long before she turns and bends over the meeting desk. I pull down her pants just enough and fill her with my package. She says, again, that it all feels really nice. I can’t believe what’s happening, I can’t believe I’ve not even had a drink. A few minutes pass.

Then there’s a noise. We stop, turn. Both worried about someone catching us. We stop what we’re doing and pull up our respective bottom pieces.

I look around the corner and no-one is there but it’s too close to ignore. The moment is over and I grab my bag and say my goodbyes. I head straight to the toilet to relieve my frustrations. It doesn’t take long for me to finish after the build up in the room and I leave work with a smile on my face.

By now it’s nearly 9pm and time to go home. Driving home in the rain, I still can’t believe it all.

… and now I’ve got to get back to work. Daydream over.

Her Orgasm Left A Wet Patch

Posted in awkwardness, Dodgy, drunk activities, Girls, one night stand, sex, sex with strangers, women on May 12, 2008 by Mike

Now this is a first for me – a woman who releases fluid when she cums.

I’ve seen pornography clips where the woman ‘squirts’ when she cums but I’ve never seen it in real life. I’ve slept with a few women in my time and never felt or seen anything like it.

I went down on her, running my tongue down the length of her body. Naturally I started in the breast region to get her excited and anticipating more. She was waiting for it. She even pushed on my shoulders to send me down there – but I wanted to take my time. So I teased her a little, licking her breasts – down to her stomach and slightly touching her inner thigh.

She moaned as I moved down.

When I got to her moist region, I surprised to find a clit piercing. I haven’t seen too many of those either but it was kind of intriguing so I continued. I ran my tongue down the moist side of her vagina … slowly grazing her clitoris. I went down and then back up to start the clitoris show.

She moaned some more.

I ran my tongue round and over her clit. Taking it slowly and concentrating on movements that would make her moan and shake. I got faster, with my tongue moving gently and quickly over her clit. She orgasmed faster then I expected and as she moaned with pleasure, my tongue running side to side, fluid started to gush out. At first I thought it was intense and didn’t expect it at all – then I came to like it.

We had sex 5 times that night and she woke me up regularly to start things over again. Everyday, when she orgasmed, fluid came out leaking over my belly and onto the bed. The more we had sex, the more I began to not like it. What started out as an intense, virginal experience to a woman releasing fluid as part of her orgasm. Then things changed and I started to get ‘turned off’ by this leaking fluid – so much so that the last 2 times we had sex I sped things up so that I would cum and things would be over.

The next morning, whilst avoiding the wet patches on my bed, I wondered if I was going through the same thing women go through with men’s cum – or is this just one of those bodily functions that takes a lot of getting used to?

Luckily it was just a one night stand and nothing to worry about in the longer term.

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